Lynda Martin
Copyright © 1986


"Wave of the Future"

"How pleasant it is to live in the country," I said to my coworker, Phyllis. "Why, 'LilSis' even gave me my 'Carak' as a bonus for living out there in my single family dwelling. Out there I can look up and still see the sky and trees; not weeping willows, of course, LilSis outlawed those the year Carak cable was proposed. Couldn't have all those water seeking roots, you know. Kind of a funny name, Carak. LilSis may have a sense of humor, but I doubt it. The 'Car' part is probably just to pacify the masses into thinking they still have some rights to their vehicles. The 'ak' definitely comes from its shape, size, and function; just like a kayak.

The Carak itself is almost a joke. Except for the control panel and the hard plastic-like transparent square shaped folding personal protector, it's inflatable. Sure solved the parking problem. It is deflated, after the protector and the panel are removed, of course, and packed into the folding protector with the panel. It then becomes portable, or it can be stored in a locker with a grow-light to recharge the panel. Of course, the Carak is a little short on interior space; just enough room for a single person and a briefcase or a bag of groceries, in case the spouse forgot to get the daily ration.

Spouse? What ever happened to wife and husband? I guess because of the changes in society, only very religious people get married. It sure doesn't help your tax situation any. Of course, if your spouse works also, they are entitled to a Carak. If they don't work, they have to wait until 11am when the system is converted to multi-personnel carriers. Talk about strange looking! An 'M-P carrier' looks like an inverted fish bowl. Why did they make the top transparent? What's to see inside the tube? Graffiti? Although, it appears the graffiti is getting better; almost an art. Why don't they black out the top and project something on it, something educational? Maybe I'll send that suggestion to LilSis headquarters. Maybe I'll get a tax deduction for my idea. At least LilSis awards originality, unlike old Uncle Sam. Maybe some of our co-workers were right; maybe old Uncle Sam got us into the Carak generation. I really don't think every drop of fossil fuel on earth is gone. Perhaps that's why they changed the name of headquarters; too many bad memories connected with old 'Unk'. Or maybe the media is right; maybe Nancy changed it.

I'll never forget the first time I operated the Carak. I went into the garage and pushed the button to turn the Lazy Susan that the Carak was sitting on. I wanted to travel North, towards work, therefore I had to point my table East, so that my connecting tube would reach the North bound tunnel. I knew that the huge spring, built into the system, would return the Lazy Susan to its original West position. I opted for this arrangement to be installed after hearing about Joe's problem going to work, when the Carak went down the tube the wrong way, and while trying to get out of the fix, she ended up in someone else's garage. No one at LilSis headquarters could ever explain why that happened, but at least with my tube originally pointed at the South bound cable, I won't have to worry about it when I come home tired and beat.

Where was I? Oh yes, I was telling you about the first time I operated the Carak. I got aboard, secured the personal protector. I'm not dumb. I heard what can happen if you don't sit down with your arms and head protected. Going down the connecting tube, you could be maimed before you ever reach the cable. I pushed the button which opened the gate. I could feel the little boat beginning to rock as the water started her forward down the tube. The next gate that I came to restrained the petite craft, until I saw an open area on the cable. Joe had just gone by, at least in the right direction. I pushed the laser control again and the gate opened. All the water behind me pushed me forward. I had to almost simultaneously push the magnetic connector button, or I would have been playing bumper cars with the next Carak. I guess your timing improves with use, but I'll tell you, that day my heart was in my mouth. Well, I made the connection and off I went, sluicing to work. The next trick was to get off the cable, open the gate, and get the magnetic field activated in time to go up the right tube. I dis-embarked at the right station, Luck, I guess, but then I had to deflate the thing. I mean, I thought I would have to sit on it to get all the air out so that it would fit into the protector. After getting there in one piece, I figured I would treat myself to a locker and stow her. After I walked out of the station, I almost got blown off my feet from the wind of the windmills. I felt like Marilyn Monroe, with my skirt blown up into my face. I know the windmills drive the cable, but couldn't innocent bystanders be protected from the wind? Maybe I'll suggest that to LilSis also.

"Well, Phyllis, I've enjoyed our chat. It's about time to go home to the country. I wonder what Billy bought for dinner tonight."